Dear Diary,


Today was a wonderful day.

Melissa smiled at me.

A lot.

I like it when she smiles.

I think I might be the reason for some of them.

Maybe. Hopefully.

We had lunch together today. She doesn't seem to be into having lunch with groups of people, maybe she just loves peace or doesn't like talking a lot.

She said I am becoming predictable.

I asked her what that meant.

She said I always sit in the same place, order the same thing, and somehow always know when she is about to steal food from my plate.

I told her that was because she always steals food from my plate.

She laughed.

Then she stole my chicken.

I let her.

It was a small piece anyway.

I bought her ice cream afterward.

She asked why.

I told her because she looked tired.

She said she wasn't tired.

She was.

Her eyes get smaller when she is tired.

She also starts rubbing her thumb against the side of her hand.

She doesn't know she does that.

But I do.

I notice a lot of things about Melissa.

The way she walks when she is happy.

The way she walks when she is angry.

The way she says "I'm fine" when she isn't fine.

The way she looks at her phone when she is waiting for someone to message her.

The way she smiles before reading a message she already knows she wants to read.

I wonder if she notices things about me.

I wonder if she notices my loneliness.

How empty I can be at times.

I asked her.

She said I am quiet.

That is true.

Then she said I am strange.

That is also true.

Then she said I am kind.

I liked that one.

I asked her why.

She said because I always notice when she needs something.

I didn't tell her that I notice everything.

That would sound strange, but I wish I could tell her so she too can notice everything about me.

So she can know me as much as I know her.

Instead I told her I just pay attention.

She said:

"That's what makes you different."

I don't think I'm different. I'm just being myself. It helps me to notice things so I can learn and understand others.

I just don't understand why people don't pay attention.

If someone is cold, give them your jacket.

If someone is hungry, give them food.

If someone is sad, sit with them.

It's not difficult.

Melissa had forgotten her umbrella today.

It was raining when we left work.

I gave her mine.

She asked what I was going to use.

I told her I would run.

She laughed and said I would get sick.

So she held the umbrella over both of us.

We walked very close.

Our shoulders touched.

I liked that. She felt warm and cozy.

I felt the need to hug her.

I wonder if she would hug me back.

She didn't move away.

I liked that even more.

Maybe she likes me.

I think she does.

She told me I make her feel safe.

That made me happy.

I want Melissa to always feel safe around me.

There are many things in the world that can hurt people.

Bad people.

Bad decisions.

Bad luck.

Mickey.

Dave.

Other things.

I don't like those things.

But I can handle them.

Melissa doesn't have to worry about them.

She can just be Melissa.

She told me something before she left.

She said she likes that I remember small things.

I remembered her favorite ice cream.

I remembered she doesn't like onions.

I remembered she hates being late.

I remembered she likes the rain but hates getting wet.

She asked how I remember all of that.

I told her:

"I listen."

She smiled.

Then she hugged me.

It lasted four seconds.

I counted.

I don't know why I counted.

I just did.

Four seconds is a long time.

I think tomorrow I'll buy her the ice cream she likes again.

Maybe I'll get two.

One for her.

One for me.

That way she won't have to steal mine.

Although I don't really mind when she does.

Goodnight, Diary.

Melissa says I'm kind.

I think I like being kind. It's nice to be kind.